Who Keeps the Engagement Ring After a Breakup? Laws & etiquette

Breaking off an engagement is tough enough without the added drama of figuring out who gets to keep the ring. And yet, that tiny (or not-so-tiny) symbol of love often becomes a big question mark when the relationship ends. So, who gets the ring? Spoiler alert: it depends—on where you live, who ended things, and sometimes even the circumstances of the breakup.

Let’s dig into this emotional and legal minefield (without losing our sparkle).

The $70,000 Question: What Happened in Massachusetts?

Recently, a Massachusetts court ruled that a woman had to return her $70,000 Tiffany & Co. engagement ring after her ex-fiancé called off their wedding. This ruling overturned 65 years of legal ambiguity in the state. In their decision, the court emphasized that engagement rings are considered conditional gifts, meaning they’re given with the expectation of marriage. No wedding? No ring (at least in Massachusetts).

The case has sparked conversations about engagement ring etiquette, laws, and what’s “fair” when a relationship doesn’t make it down the aisle.

The Rules Around Rings: Conditional Gifts or Forever Yours?

Laws vary widely, but here are some general guidelines on what happens to engagement rings after a breakup:

1. Conditional Gifts

   • In many places (like Massachusetts), an engagement ring is considered a gift with strings attached. If the wedding doesn’t happen, the ring goes back to the giver—regardless of who called it off.

2. Fault-Based Laws

   • Some states take a “who’s to blame?” approach. If you called off the wedding, you may forfeit the ring. But if your ex is the one who ran off, you might have a case for keeping it.

3. Unconditional Gifts

   • A handful of places consider an engagement ring a gift without strings. Once it’s given, it’s yours to keep, breakup or not.

4. Canadian Perspective

   • Since Livia Diamonds is proudly Toronto-based, let’s talk about Canada! Here, the rules align with the conditional gift philosophy. If the engagement ends, the ring typically goes back to the giver—though individual cases can vary.

What to Do With the Ring After a Breakup?

If you find yourself wondering what to do with an engagement ring post-breakup, here are a few options:

• Return It: If the law or your personal sense of honor dictates, hand it back.
• Sell It: Many people choose to sell their rings, especially if they no longer want the reminder. (Fun fact: Livia Diamonds offers ring redesign services if you’d rather turn the diamond into something new.)
• Repurpose It: Consider transforming the ring into another piece of jewelry—a pendant or earrings, for example.
• Keep It: In some cases, the ring may hold sentimental value beyond the breakup. Just be sure you’re keeping it for the right reasons.

So, Who Keeps the Ring?

The answer isn’t one-size-fits-all. While laws provide some guidance, emotional and ethical considerations often come into play. One thing’s for sure: whether you’re the giver or the receiver, an engagement ring isn’t just a piece of jewelry—it’s a symbol of love, commitment, and, sometimes, complicated legal battles.